www.justatitch.com

Every year, I try and sit down to write a list of the things I am most thankful for.

My gratitude this year goes beyond being just appreciative. It is, at times, overwhelming relief.

2009 has been a year of close calls.  It started in February, when I was given a pink slip and told that I might not have a job next year.  In April, I found out that I was “safe” and had a contract for the year to come.  In August, my family received the worst news: my grandma had been hospitalized with E. Coli poisoning and her kidneys were failing.  As we gathered together in a small hospital room, it seemed as if we might lose my Grandma Carol, who is one of the most important people in my life.  Slowly, she began healing and overcoming her disease.  I spoke with her yesterday regarding what we are all bringing to Thanksgiving.  I was so happy when I got off the phone, realizing that it might have been otherwise.  Yes, my dad is still battling cancer, but we have made it through chemo and are nearing the end of radiation.  So far, things are looking good.  We have hope, and at this point, we are grateful for all that has gone well.

This year, I am thankful, most of all for the things that could have been different.  I could be laid off, I could have lost my grandmother, my dad could be much more seriously advanced.  But he is not, and for that, I am thankful.  I am thankful that tomorrow, I will go to my parents house and it will be like other years.  All of those that I love will be there, and we will share a meal and say grace and be grateful.

I am thankful for my family, who has always been close, but seems to grow closer during times of struggle.  I am thankful for my mom, who is my friend, my confidante, my support.  For my dad, who is the person I turn to for advice, who makes me laugh and who I trust unequivocally.  I am thankful for my little brother, who has a big year coming up in which he will marry my soon-to-be sister-in-law, something I am so excited about for him.  I am thankful for my grandparents and the love and support they provide.  I lucked out in the family department, and I am grateful that I have a family I absolutely adore beyond all reason.

I am thankful for my friends.  For the nights over coffee or wine or board games, where we have shared laughter and tears.  For G-chats and IM’s and postcards and dinners out.  For nights at Red Robin or sushi or on the couch.  For text messages that make me giggle.  For the times when you, my dear friends, have held me together with your prayers, your love, your listening ears and your hugs.  For my Blathering ladies, who took an ordinary September weekend and turned it into magic and love and friendships that have stood the test of time.

I am grateful for Andrew.  Yes, we’ve had our rough moments, but those have been outweighed by nights laughing so hard I can’t breathe and cuddles and kisses.  For the 9 months we’ve managed to share an apartment without one of us incurring a serious injury or death, and we’ve even managed to make it pretty and work out the cooking and cleaning and the business of life.  I’m grateful that you’ve truly become my best friend, the MVP of Team Amy, and my favorite person.  I’m thankful that we haven’t given up.

I am thankful that I can right these words at all.  That I am so blessed and loved and have enough to write 500 words of gratitude about.  I am deeply blessed.  There are bad days, there are really bad days but mostly, there are days.  And many of them are filled with sweetness and joy.  I am so lucky.

And I am so, so grateful.  For all of it.

Happy, happy Thanksgiving, friends.  May it be lovely.