I did it!

Posted by admin on February 6th, 2010. Filed under: Uncategorized.

When I turned 26 this past April, I set a goal that scared the hell out of me: go to the dentist.  Sure, you can judge me, but it’d been a few years.  Literally—and my parents will attest to this—the mere mention of going to the dentist could give me a stressy rash.  I would get red, break out into mini-hives and tear up at the thought of sitting in the chair.

I don’t know what exactly freaks me out about the dentist.  I mean, the pain, obviously.  But something happens when I sit down in the chair.  I freak out at the prospect of people putting their hands and x-ray things and weird tools in my mouth (TWSS!) and having no control.  I don’t like it, I can’t handle it and yes, at one point a few years ago, I pushed a dentists hand out of my mouth, removed that hideous paper towel necklace they make you wear and calmly walked out of the dentists office.

Still, last August, I decided that enough was enough, and had a cleaning.  The dentist I saw was a real jerk and confirmed every fear I’d ever had: he was unwilling to work with my anxiety, told me to “calm down” and “not be a baby” and then proceeded to assault my mouth.  A few months later, when I started having actual pain, I had to find someone else.

While calling around on a random Sunday while dying of pain, I spoke to one office who didn’t bat an eye when I cried on the phone out of pain and fear.  They encouraged me to just come in, get a prescription and see how I did—and promised that I could be in charge.  I went, and I am so glad I did.  My dentist was kind, gave me the good drugs so I could sit in the chair without biting him, lets me watch movies and Arrested Development, and never once made me feel any less than awesome.  If something hurt, he took his time.  When I had my wisdom teeth pulled, the receptionist came in and held my hand because I was AWAKE and FREAKED OUT.  They’re even working with me financially because getting good teef ain’t cheap, yo.

Yesterday, I had my final bit of dental work finished.  As I walked out, I felt SO GOOD about myself.  Maybe it’s a weird, silly thing to be proud of, but I faced one of my biggest fears.  I not only conquered it, but eliminated it—sure, I still need nitrous to sit in the chair, but no more valium, no more tears, no more anxiety.  It took some time, the incredible patience of the dentist and his amazing staff and a significant amout of Vicodin, but mostly?  It took me being brave and doing something I was dreading in order to make myself better.

And I did it.

I am really hoping to cling to this experience when I feel afraid—I literally never, ever thought I’d get this taken care of, yet I am sitting here, just a few months later, all done.  I’m so glad I conquered my fear.

27 Responses to I did it!

  1. Selaen

    Hmm, I’ve never had anything but good experiences with dentists.. Even when they had to almost destroy my jaw to get my wisdom teeth out, I was in a very happy place (might have had something to do with the drugs…), so going to the dentist was just.. I dunno, normal? I’ve not been to see a dentist in years. Why? Because it’s absolutely impossible to get an NHS dentist. I put myself on a waiting list for 5 surgeries 2 years ago and there’s still a 2-year wait. For private ones I got told that there’s a 1-year wait. Yey for the British system! :D

    But otherwise, don’t you just love the feeling of just-been-dentist-cleaned teeth?! Shiny!

    xx

  2. cuppycakes

    Yay for you! Dentists kind of weird me out, and ever since I had my wisdom teeth out, I’ve been funny with them too. It’s just really awkward to lie there while they prod around in your mouth.

  3. Karen

    Going to the dentist is definitely not one of my favorite activities, but I don’t mind it that much. I try to go twice a year.
    I am glad you were able to conquer some of that anxiety. That first dentist sounds like an insensitive ass. I don’t know how these kind of doctors don’t realize that if anything their insensitive behavior is going to make your anxiety worse. Happy for you that you found a dentist who is sensitive to your anxiety, and decided to work with you instead of against you.

  4. Sarah Faherty

    Good on you! Facing any kind of fear is brave, and you’ve just made me feel bad for avoiding the dentist out of pure laziness. I’m not scared as such, just hate the whole process.

  5. Lizzie

    Dentists scare the crap outta me – I’ve not been in years!! It’s not like my teeth are in bad condition or anything, and if it got bad I’d definitely go. But the last time I went for a filling she “forgot” to numb the area… she was drilling my teeth and I was feeling everything *shudders*

  6. Camels & Chocolate

    I’m with you. I mean, who actually LIKES going to the dentist? The scraping and cleaning–I always feel as if a tooth is going to break right off!

  7. Home Sweet Sarah

    Congratulations on meeting your goal/overcoming the dentist fear! It sounds like you found a great dentist, so that’s awesome. Nothing’s worse than someone who’s hurting you acting like a dick-head, right?

    I, umm, well, I love the dentist. If my insurance would cover it, I’d go once a month. Weeeeird, I know.

  8. Keenie Beanie

    I don’t like the dentist either, although since I finally developed a steady habit of flossing a few years, the visits aren’t much of a big deal anymore. But my husband, strapping 6′2″ that could face almost anything, literally crumples when it comes to the dentist. I go with him for moral support every time, and I know he’s not exaggerating his fear when I take his hand and feel how clammy his palm is, the poor dear.

    Good job conquering your fear, and how awesome that you found a dentist you like… the good drugs are important!

  9. Lindsay

    Yay! That’s the best feeling. I actually love my dentist (I’ve been going to him since I first had teeth) and I kind of like going to see him so we can catch up on life, etc. I know, I’m a total weirdo.

    I’m sad we won’t get to hang out at the meet-up, but Sacramento and LA aren’t too far away. If you’re ever down here or I’m up there, we should make plans!

  10. Amanda

    I’m not scared of the dentist, but I don’t enjoy going. We lost our insurance when I was in high school, and I haven’t been in forever. I take care of my teeth, but I know that I need to go in and just get them checked. I’m just avoiding…I know that I’m probably going to need at least 1 of my wisdom teeth out and I just don’t have time to deal with that right now! :)
    You’re super brave. And I’m sending you an email about something…watch for it.

  11. Brittany

    Congratulations! I don’t think that’s a silly thing to be proud of at all. When you conquer something you’re that scared of, it makes you feel like there are all sorts of things you could do! And I’m with you on the dentist fear. Mine isn’t nearly as bad as yours was, but I have to remind myself to relax whenever I’m in the chair….if I don’t, I end up with my shoulders all tensed up around my ears!

  12. san

    I am so proud of you for overcoming your fears!

  13. Ashley

    Good for you. When I was a kid, I used to actually like going to the dentist. I know. The older I grown, the more apprehensive I’ve becomes about the dentist, but the more often you go in, the less painful each visit is . Congrats to you for acing a fear.

  14. Her

    Yay for you! Just trust those drugs. Ever since I had braces in middle school, I have HATED the dentist, but I really should get in. I had Valium for the first (and only so far!) time when I had my wisdom teeth out, and it made me trippy enough to ask them (during the actual procedure) to save the teeth for the tooth fairy. I was in college at that point. Yup.

  15. Lisa

    That is awesome! Congrats, girlfriend. I’m proud of you!

  16. Stephany

    I totally understand this feeling of accomplishment, since my mom went through the same thing. She went for the first time in YEARS (it had been at least 5+ years since the last time she had been) a few years ago and she was scared out of her mind! Luckily, she went to a good dentist that calmed all her fears and she’s not as terrified as she used to be. Her going even got some of her co-workers to get over their fears and go to the dentist (one of her co-workers was even given drugs to calm her down).

    I’ve never been terrified of going to the dentist. It’s just not on my list of Top 10 Things That Make Me Happy. I haven’t been in a few years, since I don’t have insurance anymore. And I KNOW I need to have my wisdom teeth removed, something I’m so, so, SO scared about since my mom and my SIL both had awful, awful experiences with.

    But congrats, girl! You did do it! I’m proud of you. :)

  17. Ashley

    I used to be terrified of going to the dentist as well, until I found a good one

  18. Kelly L

    Yuck, I hate going to the dentist. I hate it even more right now because I thought my insurance was SUPPOSED to cover everything and I just got a $105 bill in the mail yesterday. But, um, that’s neither here nor there.

    I don’t know what it is about dentists that just creep me out. I’ve always had good teeth and I always went every August before school started and it was never as traumatizing as I built it out in my head to be, but… I don’t know. It’s still… unsettling.

    But, good for you for finally facing your fears!!! As a bonus? Great teeth! It’s like a REWARD for being brave! Yay!!!

  19. Brianne

    Dude…the dentist tweaks me too. Mainly because someone’s hands are in your mouth and it just grosses me the hell out.

  20. steph anne

    I don’t think I know anyone who really enjoys going to the dentist. I hate going there and it’s been a few years for me too and I seriously need to make an appointment soon, crap! When I was younger I used to rip up the dentist reminders that they mail you so my parents wouldn’t find out I had an appointment. It never worked anyways since they call you the day before for a last reminder.

  21. Maxie

    That is awesome. Going to the dentist isn’t one of my big fears, but I have a bunch that I want to try to tackle this year. It’s hard, but it’s excellent that you did it!

  22. Emily Jane

    Yay for you!! Way to go on overcoming the fear :)

  23. Manderz

    Good job on conquering the fear. When I worked at a dental office, I was honestly shocked at how many people hated coming. While I don’t love going myself, it’s never bothered me. One thing I learned though, is that most dentists/assistants/hygienists/etc want you to be comfortable – but if you don’t speak up to let them know if something hurts or your chair makes the blood rush to your head or whatever, they can’t remedy the situation. If they don’t, well you did the right thing by getting out of that chair immediately.

  24. Amy

    I’m right there with you. I have full dental benefits and I still put off my dentist appointments wayyyy too long. It’s been almost two years since I’ve gone. I’m not afraid of the dentist, I’ve never had a particularly bad experience at the dentist…I just HATE going and I never remember to go!

    But good for you in facing your fear and going. I’m glad you went!!

  25. Suburban Sweetheart

    I can so relate. I used to hate my dentist, but I was on my mom’s insurance plan & she absolutely, steadfastly refused to get another dentist (something about plan said we could only have one). I didn’t see a dentist for two and a half years!

    Somehow, I brought myself to give my own dentist another chance, & now I adore her. Last time I went, she let me listen to my iPod while she worked on me so that I could tune out more easily! I recommend it to anyone who’s got dentistaphobia!

    Glad you went. :)

  26. Awmb

    I conquered that fear last year as well. I went to the dentist after 4 years of not seeing anyone, and had a lot of work to do. No root canals like you, but fillings upon fillings, and wisdom teeth. The first visit was awful because I was so stressed out, but after that it just got easier. I realized that the fear I had stemmed from my family dentist growing up, and I realized how awful she was at her job! After a few horrible experiences with her, you’d think that every dentist was out to kill you via drills.
    I’m glad you were able to somewhat overcome this!

  27. Ally

    Way to go! I have actually had pretty good experiences with dentists. I’ve been putting it off getting my wisdom teeth out for a while now, and I’ve decided this spring is the time. I am feeling kind of apprehensive about having a dental surgeon cut teeth out of my jaw. Ugh.

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