How to annoy me…
Posted by admin on February 1st, 2010. Filed under: Uncategorized.It’s Monday. Mondays annoy me. But that’s not the only thing. With that in mind, I present to you, a how-to guide, if you will, of how to annoy me:
- Comment negatively on curly hair. I have curly hair. Like, kinky, tightly curled hair and it’s naturally like that. Personally, I like it–it’s fun, bouncy and also THE WAY MY HAIR IS. Still, people can’t help but comment: “You know there are straighteners, right?” Yes. I am aware, thank you very much. My second favorite is when they feign jealousy, like, “Oooh, I wish I had curly hair!” It’s the same thing I do when girls lament their small chests: pretend I wish I wasn’t well endowed. IT’S A LIE. Ever heard of a little thing called “free drinks?” Just save the comments, the product suggestions, the general commentary on curly hair. My hair is curly, and I like it. THANKS.
- Suggest that I tan because I am pale. I am pale. I don’t care. I don’t find my pale skin offensive enough to go sit in a tanning booth or coat myself in orange paint. I am sorry if my pastiness offends you, and rest assured that closer to summer, I’ll be using my lotion with “glow” but since it’s February, I’m gonna stay pale.
- Remark that teachers get too much time off, or shouldn’t complain about their job because of summers. Trust me: if you were trapped in a room with middle schoolers for nine months of your year, you’d need summers off, too. Also, let’s compare our hours and commitments for just one week. THEN you can comment. I love my job, and trust me, I love my summers…but don’t get all crazy on me about the time off until you’ve taught for a year.
- Chew loudly. This could seriously be it’s own post, but sometimes, I just wonder what happened in other people’s homes growing up. My mom had zero tolerance for smacking, chewing with mouths open and shoveling food in. And god bless her for it. There is no excuse for poor table manners.
- Pronounce “mature” as “ma-toor.” It makes you sound stupid. End of story.
- Make fun of bloggers. Sure, I guess that’s a sensitivity for me, for obvious reasons. But seriously? I’m pretty sure that the Internet makes everyone’s life easier—I am choosing to have an active role. Just because I blog doesn’t mean that I lack friends in real life—trust me, I have lots of friends online and off, and am grateful for them both. I hate, hate, hate the stereotypes associated with bloggers as nerds or “inappropriate” online. The Internet is lovely, and people shouldn’t knock it ’til they try it.
- Read over my shoulder. I hate it. Whether it’s someone reading the magazine I’m browsing, trying to see what I’m typing or looking at my iPhone while I type, nothing makes me stabbier than feeling an extra set of eyes over my shoulder. Get your own OR mind your own business.
- Complaining, non-stop. I like a good gripe session. I enjoy whining and complaining and being crabby from time to time. But I get so flippin’ annoyed with THOSE PEOPLE who are always tired, sick, stressed, having drama, upset, hungry, full, feeling fat, feeling sad, blah blah blah. Life sucks sometimes, but it’s a lot easier if you learn to LAUGH and LIGHTEN UP. At least sometimes. I realize that this is an ironic way to end a post that does just that, but the difference is that tomorrow? THERE WILL BE NO COMPLAINING. Or at least not much.
I feel better already. What annoys you? Leave me your pet peeves in the comments…
February 1st, 2010 at 2:16 am
It’s refreshing to find that someone loves their hair just the way it is! So often curly people want straight hair and straight hair people want curly hair. I have in between hair and I wish it would pick a direction, any direction will do! Anyway, I personally don’t like straightened hair when it is obviously someone has really curly hair and has ironed it over and over and OVER again to make it sit flat. Because it does sit flat, totally flat, so flat that it doesn’t move at all. That is not natural. I should say I do have a straightener (I waited until the wet to dry one dropped to a ridiculously low price, no way I’m paying $300 for a hair styling thingy!), and it helps to keep my sometimes large hair under control, but I’m careful not to straighten it within an inch of it’s life, just enough to achieve a straight-ish style from time to time, and to make the ends all sit one way.
I’m also pale and proud! In the sun I go red and back to white, it’s impossible for me to tan. And I’d rather be pale than orange or have skin cancer thank you very much.
I’m guilty of reading over shoulders sometimes… when something catches my eye and I can’t wait my turn or get my own paper/webpage/whatever. I try not to though, it bugs me too!
February 1st, 2010 at 5:05 am
I have a complainer at work. Granted, she is having a lot of serious medical tests done just now.. but I walked past her the other day, made eye contact, and was trapped for fifteen minutes listening to her whinging.
I’ve learned MY lesson.
February 1st, 2010 at 5:25 am
I always envied the length of teacher’s holidays but since I have teachers as parents I know there’s a disadvantage to even this – the fact that you are off at the same time as all the school kids, the prices of holidays are higher then AND . . . in my mum’s case . . . you tend to run into your students on holiday or on the plane!
Hate people reading over my shoulder when I’m typing too. I feel like that’s happening right now as I type. (If you are looking at my screen, stop it!)
February 1st, 2010 at 6:23 am
Wait, lady, but – I actually AM jealous of curly hair.
February 1st, 2010 at 7:29 am
i hatehatehate when people comment on anyone else’s weight! i’m skinny, i have been my entire life no matter what i do, and somehow people believe that’s it’s perfectly acceptable to comment on thin people’s weight however they would like. they’ll ask you how much you weigh, make comments like “do you ever eat??” and other asinine remarks.
would you walk up to a woman who is 300 lbs and ask her how much she weighs? no. would you ever comment to an overweight person that they should “probably skip the cake”? um, no. so why do they think it’s acceptable to say such things to a thin person… URRRGGHH
February 1st, 2010 at 8:14 am
Pale is the new tan! Yeah! (Or at least that’s what I tell myself every year.) I could never be a teacher. I admire y’all and think you deserve your summers! And your last bullet point is really funny.
February 1st, 2010 at 8:14 am
I hate when people say that they want to be a teacher because of all the vacation time. Well, sure, but say good-bye to your evenings and weekends! My mom works longer hours than I do – and I work in PR in Manhattan!
My biggest pet peeve is when people go “Can you eat that?” because of my diabetes. I have had diabetes for 16 years and you’ve had it for how long? Because you saw Julia Roberts die in Steel Magnolias? Puh-LEEZE. Yes! I can eat that!!
February 1st, 2010 at 8:16 am
You made me burst out giggling, “Ma-toor” totally drives me up the wall, every time!! =)
February 1st, 2010 at 8:20 am
I always wanted curly red hair, blue eyes, pale skin and freckles, because I am very Irish.
But I am tan, have dark straight hair and brown eyes.
So I permed my hair a few times. And I loved it. But that shit is expensive and I’m broke.
So I wouldn’t get annoyed when people say they want your hair because I would be one of those people that my first reaction to being introduced to you would be “Goddamn! I want your hair!”
Also, I am larger in the chestal region and I wish they were slightly smaller sometimes. Just enough to be able to wear oddly cut shirts without a bra. That would be nice.
February 1st, 2010 at 8:29 am
What kind of nosy people do you know that do this stuff? God sakes.
February 1st, 2010 at 8:32 am
I’m not allowed to get mad at pronunciation issues because my “British” way is pretty much the minority every time, even with “Matoors”
I hate reading over my shoulder too – especially when I’m WRITING something. I don’t know why, but I can’t write even if D walks by behind me, even though I KNOW he reads every blog anyway 
I succumb to tanning – only because when I don’t people always comment on how sick and poorly I look, lol. I hate slow walkers with no sense of awareness – I walk quickly, I like being places on time and efficiently, and I hate nothing more than being stuck behind someone who clearly has all the time in the world to walk down a hallway and makes no effort at any sort of consciousness of their surroundings!! I also hate HATE HATE people who kick the back of my chair. In movies, on planes… I *have* to sit at the back 
February 1st, 2010 at 8:50 am
Majority of my college friends are baffled about my online presence.
February 1st, 2010 at 8:56 am
Seriously, at least once a week I wish (out loud) that I had curly hair instead of my perfectly straight hair. I also have mad fro envy and have had to actually restrain myself from touching beautiful heads of curly hair.
(yah, I’m a little weird).
And pale people unite! You just need to move to a colder climate, like Nova Scotia, where the tanned people really stick out. I am also a fan of pointing out how fantastic I’ll look when I’m 50 due to my lack of tanning and religious skin regime.
February 1st, 2010 at 9:27 am
OMG… when we’ll meet next week, you’ll see that I am super-pale, too. People always comment that I look like I am sick, but you know what? I am definitely healthier than all those people who spent HOURS on the tanning beds (NOT healthy!). And anyway, isn’t pale the new tan?
Also, my whole family consists of teachers (I was on my way to becoming one myself!) and even though, yes, it’s nice to have a long summer break, teachers have a lot of work and stress, so they deserve the time off.
February 1st, 2010 at 9:35 am
1. I truely do wish I had curly hair – mine is board-straight and it gets really boring . ..
2. I’m so pale, I glow in the dark. Seriously. Well almost – but still. I hate people telling me I need to tan. Worse yet – I can’t stand when people tan in winter. Its winter! You’re supposed to be pale!! I refuse to get in a tanning bed – I see no reason to lay in an oven, when I can lay outside and enjoy the scenery . . .
February 1st, 2010 at 10:25 am
Good timing for this. I need a little vent:
People who chew with their mouths open. When I order a drink at a fast-food drive-thru and it’s not filled up (I’M PAYING TWO BUCKS FOR THIS, FILL IT UP). People who pronounce supposedly like supposably. The shiny happy Facebook friends who only update their status with a variation of I LOOOOOVE LIFE and I AM SO HAAAAAPY and I HAVE THE BEST LIFE EVEEEEER. Small, yappy dogs. And when Mike stomps around every morning right in front of Kyle’s room and inevitably wakes him up. STAB STAB STAB.
February 1st, 2010 at 10:35 am
Totally with you on the pale thing. I am of Irish and Norwegian descent, I CAN NOT, WILL NOT tan no matter what I do. Even if someone *brilliantly* suggests tanning beds. I have tried it ALL. Not to mention, skin cancer runs in my family, and I had pre-cancerous cells removed when I was 25. Tanning is not my number one priority, and it really should not be anyone’s.
February 1st, 2010 at 10:58 am
Oh I’m with you on drama queens and people making fun of blogging, they always think like it’s a waste of time and like I cant find friends in real life. Guess what, I have many. Yet people who know the most are still my blog friends. I cant believe these ignorant comments.
I can’t stand people with fake tans at all.
ps. anyhoo, this Wednesday ( Feb 3rd ), Project Barbie is due. You’re joining right? Hope you do and get your picture all pretty in pink posted by then.Let me know!:) I wanna post everyone’s pictures together.
February 1st, 2010 at 11:27 am
Do people really say that about your hair? That’s so rude. I have this wavy/curly mess going on and it’s a pain in the butt but that is what I have to work with… I will also admit, I have the straight-hair envy.
Same thing with the breasticles. I happen to be well-endowed. Sucks to be you, little-chested people. Ha. It’s the trade off for being, um, curvy. You can cram yourself into skinny jeans, that’s great. I will be over here taking the attention off your size 0 waist with my size DD girl parts.
Also: I am pale (It’s like we’re the same person! haha). Pale is the new tan. own it.
I hate listening to people chew. I don’t even like listening to MYSELF chew when I am at my desk with headphones on because somehow that manages to magnify it. Ew.
Also: I HATE PEOPLE OVER MY SHOULDER. It makes me so stabby, I can’t even tell you. OMG, like, intense irritation rising in my throat and I have to refrain from snapping. OMG OMG OMG. Don’t even get me started.
My other peeve is poor English language/grammar usage. And apostrophe usage. ACK.
February 1st, 2010 at 11:58 am
I totally get the curly hair stuff! I have curl, but not the kinky curls. So I can straighten it easily and wear it curly easily. But people always comment when it’s curly that they wish they had curl.. and they’re so blatantly lying!
oh and don’t you love when people make fun of blogging in front of you, when they KNOW you blog?! It’s like seriously, I’m not making fun of the fact that your outfit doesn’t look good or that you watch shitty tv shows. Don’t make fun of what I do.
February 1st, 2010 at 12:08 pm
As a fellow curly-haired pale person, I feel your pain. I hate when people say ‘oh I wish I had curly hair.’ I always feel obliged to reply with ‘no you don’t’ or ‘I wish I had straight hair.’ But the truth is, I love my curls and I wouldn’t have it any other way. It may sound cocky, but I consider my hair one of my best features.
So now, when people say they want my hair, instead of giving into the urge to be that cocky girl and say ‘Oh I know! Doesn’t my hair rock,’ I try to just say a polite ‘thank-you’.
February 1st, 2010 at 1:38 pm
I love my pale skin! Sure, it looks funny as a Florida girl but 30 years from now, I’M not going to be the one sitting in a hospital, getting skin cancer sliced off my skin. And when I do go out and “get some sun” I always slather up with suntan lotion. My grandma has talked to me enough about it!
I have a whole list of pet peeves. I should make a post about them because it’s pretty long and some of them are pretty weird.
February 1st, 2010 at 1:41 pm
My mom says “ma-toor.” You calling my mama stupid?
(Kidding. I, too, think it sounds DUMB and it drives me BANANAS.)
February 1st, 2010 at 1:48 pm
This is why I’m convinced we’d be BFFs if we lived in the same town. The “ma-toor” thing goes for “tempa-toor” as well. My pastor says it that way and I feel really bad about it, but I want to injure him each time.
Hollow-heads are also annoying. The ones who eat chips or cereal and you can hear every crunch echoing in their skulls. My eye twitches, seriously.
Loud neighbors. Music/having sex/bumping into the walls/whatever… I don’t care. I hate them all.
February 1st, 2010 at 1:49 pm
… and political/religious blogs. I have my own opinions and beliefs and everyone has theirs… but it ALWAYS offends someone when you see posts about it. Aiiii!
February 1st, 2010 at 2:17 pm
If anything, I’d tell you teachers don’t make nearly enough money given the responsibility they undertake!
February 1st, 2010 at 3:08 pm
I’m so with you on the complaining thing. I have enough of my own issues and I prefer to keep them to myself or pick an appropriate time to vent. People who basically verbally vomit their drama all over you on a regular basis are the worst.
End rant.
February 1st, 2010 at 3:38 pm
I second Em’s. I walk with purpose and I need everyone around me to do the same.
February 1st, 2010 at 4:36 pm
Add nuc-U-ler for nuclear to the list.
So many of your peeves are mine–I love it! I’m finally learning how to cut out the constant whiners, and frankly, I’m much happier for it. I understand bad patches, believe me. But…when it becomes a way of life? Nope.
February 1st, 2010 at 5:33 pm
When people tell me that I’m short, as if I didn’t know.
February 1st, 2010 at 6:30 pm
Um, YES to all these things. And pale sisters represent! We shouldn’t have to feel shame that our ancestors migrated up north, people.
My pet peeve: people who use cell phones while on the toilet. Seriously. What the eff?
February 1st, 2010 at 6:56 pm
Some people just dont get blogging.
Too bad… they’re missing out
February 1st, 2010 at 8:11 pm
Also, teachers who claim that the three best things about being a teacher are June, July, and August. You just give the rest of us a bad name.
People who complain, but can never be bothered to try and change something.
People who “just KNOW” this is my month to get pregnant. Suck it.
February 1st, 2010 at 8:20 pm
Wow people who make fun of bloggers are the J word. JEALOUS
February 1st, 2010 at 8:20 pm
I love that you end a list of complaints with a bullet about hating complaining. Feels ironic – the fun kind, not the ten-thousand-spoons bullshit kind.
I actually DO wish I had curly hair, so girls like me don’t feign that jealousy. I have thin, wispy, lame straight hair & I DON’T love it…
February 1st, 2010 at 8:24 pm
Girlll I am so pale, I’m clear! I cannot STAND when people ask me “why don’t you get some sun?” Uhhh cuz I burn and it hurts. I do not tan and I don’t plan on laying in a tanning bed and getting cancer just so I can be a little darker. No thank you. Biggg pet peeve of mine.
February 1st, 2010 at 9:31 pm
I really have a hard time with people who ask me if I am busy….I am not only a teacher but a principal. YES I am busy but I have the time for you.
People who think my life is perfect. It isn’t, but the bumps are what make us interesting.
By the way, there is a definite difference between pale (my derm says alabaster is “in”) and sickly. It doesn’t take a trained eye.
February 1st, 2010 at 9:55 pm
I absolutely hate the comments about paleness too! It’s not my fault that I only burn and that I would rather not have to go through that just to get a teeny tiny tan. And there is NO way I’m going to a tanning salon to use a cancer box. No thanks.
February 2nd, 2010 at 12:13 am
Haha, I like when people say they’re jealous of my tiny boobies, even though they are big liars.
February 2nd, 2010 at 11:50 am
“Ever hear of a thing called ‘free drinks’?” “It makes you sound stupid. End of story.’ This is so funny. You are so funny. I want to write my own!
You know what else I hate (similarly.) When people say things like “Your hair is so long!” or “That’s a sparkly dress!” What is that? Is that supposed to be a compliment? Or a put down? Because it sounds like a lame observation to me. It’s like… what are you saying to me? Is this what small talk sounds like?
February 2nd, 2010 at 7:18 pm
Yes, yes a million times yes! Especially to the pale bit, the teachers bit and the complaining bit. Well said!
February 2nd, 2010 at 11:58 pm
Ohmigod, I love this post. And agree there is nothing wrong with naturally curly hair/being pale. (I’m a redhead, what do people expect?)
February 4th, 2010 at 9:43 am
[...] thought that since I started off the week with things that annoy me, I should balance it with things I love… « Those three little [...]
February 5th, 2010 at 9:50 am
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by rssBetterSleep, rssBetterSleep. rssBetterSleep said: 4vrTrd> http://j.mp/bnQQrt http://www.justatitch.com» Blog Archive » How to annoy me…… [...]
February 15th, 2010 at 2:04 pm
My hair is naturally wavy. I would love it much more if I could find a product that will hold the curl and not make my hair look wet or crunchy all day. The best thing I have found is good old fashioned conditioner. Yeah, like the stuff you’re supposed to wash out of your hair after showering. Got any product suggestions?
Peeves:
- Negativity.
- Text or IM lingo in blogs. Spell out words. It’s so annoying to have to decode blogs.
- People with picky food palates. If I ever have kids, they will eat EVERYTHING. I’m so thankful my parents made me eat different foods. There’s not much I don’t like or am not willing to try.