I’m not proud of this, but I think you should know I’m a really good Google detective, Facebook stalker, and Twitter watcher. Don’t judge me, because I’m pretty sure the rest of you do this too. Unless you’re one of those “I’m too cool for Facebook!” people who claims to login only once a week, yet, I still see a little green dot next to your name EVERYDAY FOR HOURS. Funny how that is.
Anywho, I was in the middle of some routine Tweet Tracking, when I noticed that someone I know had been tweeting at celebrities. I’m not talking the occasional retweet of something funny Rainn Wilson says, I’m talking about having an actual dialogue, like, “Enjoy your yogurt!” and “YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL” (said to Amanda Bynes, by a man in his thirties. CREEPY).
And seriously, I’m all, “WHAT?” because I know I get excited when people reply to me on Twitter but I doubt that freaking Amanda Bynes or Demi Moore is all, “Awww, some creepy dude thinks I’m hot!” and jumps on Tweetie to write some reply. I just can’t picture it.
But the epidemic continues on Facebook. Recently, I became a fan of Fake AP Stylebook, because it’s hilarious, and I noticed people writing the stupidest things below their statuses. I mean, here’s the thing: Fake AP Stylebook is funny. Why mess with perfection? But then people try and like, top the joke…and yeah, it just ruins it. Even more annoying are the people who comment on Coachella’s wall (pssst…are you going to Coachella?! I want to, and we should meet up. You should camp with me and we can sleep in a real pile!), listing their own lineup of shows they want to see, wish were there, etc. Let me be the first to tell them: NO ONE CARES. No one.
I don’t really know why this whole thing bothers me so much. I mean, besides being ridiculous. I feel embarrassed for the people doing it. Like, one time, I tweeted at Dooce, and I was MORTIFIED that someone would see it and be all, “The hell? She’s NOT gonna reply to that crap!”
It’s not that I’m not a fan of the fan letter…it’s just the public aspect. Fan letters are private, dontcha think?
Confession time: when I was in 7th grade, I wrote a fan letter to the Spice Girls.
No, not kidding.
I purchased their cassette tape, a single of “Wannabe” and use to dance around my room listening to my Walkman singing along. The message of not letting a guy get too close until he was cool with my friends really spoke to my 13-year-old heart. I’m not really sure why, actually, for two reasons: 1) I didn’t really have a whole lot of friends who weren’t catty middle schoolers who wouldn’t have cared about a boy getting close to me and 2) No guy wanted anything to do with me for like, at least 3 more years.
But I digress. I wrote them a sweet, heartfelt letter about GIRL POWER! and how INSPIRING! they were to me. And then I mailed it, and I’m sad to say that I really, truly believed that I might get a letter back. Or maybe a photo. I didn’t.
But I’m guessing you knew that already.
Just like we all know that Snooki isn’t going to reply to you on Twitter any time soon.
Copyright © 2012
I wrote a fan letter to Ann M. Martin, author of the Babysitters Club. I got a letter back. I think she had time on her hands.
lol! Oh yea. That stuff makes me raise my eyebrows too.
Only the other night when I tweeted about Nathan Fillion being too attractive for his own good, and it turns out that one of my readers and followers actually knows the dude because he’s from Edmonton. Which means I’m practically one divorce away from sealing the deal.
Please be happy for me. Mister has given me his blessing.
I’ve never written a fan letter. I did, however, sleep with a picture of Leonardo DiCaprio under my mattress for a few months after seeing Romeo and Juliet.
I LOVE “WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE” and I love that you quoted it. Brandon and I use that line all the time!
And Kyla Roma, I agree about Nathan Fillion… I am slightly obsessed.
Lol, your Dooce thing reminded me of the other day I was all, um I refuse to comment on a blog with like 100 comments…they aren’t even going to read what I say!!!
Just last week I replied to a local ‘rock star’s facebook status and cringed that he would be “who is that” and knowing that there would be a thread of twenty comments below from groupies/fans. Its all so awkward.
I @dooce’d once too, and I was fairly disappointed but then I realised she has a bajillion followers and it all made sense.
I used to be the biggest Posh Spice fan and I actually had her mom’s address and I wrote her a letter and got a letter back and an autograph
You are so funny. Haha! I love this. I’m a stalker, too. I had a huuuge thing with the Spice Girls too! Right around 13, sigh. My friend and I would sit in her room and just…listen, to the Spice Girls. Too funny! My love letters went to Jonathan Taylor Thomas. Oh, brother.
I’ve never written a fan letter. At least I don’t think… anyway. I’ve kind of blocked my teenage years.
Anyway.
I’m with you on the fan-ing thing. I read the blog of a relatively famous musician, and the number of people that comment on the blog with comments like they’re BFFs or something bugs the crap out of me.
Do they really think he blogs to get comments? Or that he reads them? Or that, if he does either of the first two things, that he will read your friendly comment about his vegetable patch and suddenly realise you’re The One and contact you?
Bugs me.
I was a loud and proud Spice Girls fan until I was old enough to realize that everyone was making fun of me. It was way good times up until then though.
I don’t @ celebrities either, in fact I have stopped following all of the ones I was following.
But I do love e-stalking looking up people on Facebook and Google.
Well, e-stalking was supposed to be crossed out.
When I was in 5th grade, my best friend and I bought matching shirts and skorts at Kmart. We went back to my house, dressed up, put our hair in top-side pigtails, and proceeded to video tape ourselves doing choreographed dancing and lip synching to the ENTIRE SPICE GIRLS TAPE. Yes, I still have the video to prove it. Will I ever? HELL NO.
haha, my bestie wrote a fan letter to Ralph Machio (sp?), aka The Karate Kid, when we were younger and got back an autographed photo. it was a big deal at the time but obviously years later we realized it was just sent from his PR people. i’m pretty sure she still has it somewhere.
I think it is all kinds of awesome that you wrote a letter to the Spice Girls. All kinds of awesome.
Renee — I got letter back from Ann M. Martin too!!!
Hahahahaha, LOVE this post. I have to say, I spent one night writing letters to celebs from their addresses in Teen Beat when I was like 8 or 9. No responders until 3 years later, I get an autographed postcard from none other than NPH, aka Doogie Howser. So who knows, maybe you’re just on backorder for the Spice Girls
I have tweeted to Julia Allison before, and to one style blogger, and both wrote me back (I asked them a question, so I think that helped).
But I haven’t tweeted to an actual celeb though I think it would be cool, because they obviously do write back to some people if you look at their twitter stream. But it’s not like they’d remember who you were or that you were the person who asked what their favorite cheese is or something.
I think I feel old and out of the loop because I didnt know what half of this stuff was. Ap stylebook? Conchella?
Spice Girls? Ok so i do know the spice girls, I did a Big Time video lyp synch at busch gardens to tell me whatcha want. I think I buried it too.
I tweeted one of my favourite authors the other day and when she replied back I felt so special! Then I remembered how years ago she’d emailed me to thank me for a positive review I’d written of one of her reviews on amazon and I wanted to say that to her (I was drunk!) but I stopped myself because that seemed pretty pathetic.
One time Open Table @-ed me and I was pretty sure that I could die happy after that.
I have @-replied celebrities a few times, with no responses. (Mainly when they ask a question and I feel the need to answer.)
Once, I actually e-mailed a member of a Christian pop band when I was in middle school. And I got an e-mail back from who I thought was him right away. In my middle-school-brain, I thought he had replied to me and I. WAS. SO. EXCITED. (Plus, he was gorgeous and I thought I was going to marry him someday) I later learned it was an automatic response to my e-mail that everyone who sends him an e-mail gets. Big, big letdown.
I wrote a fan letter to JTT when I was young… and I got a 8×10 glossy.
Think I’d get the same if I Tweeted Snooki?
I wasn’t even thinking when I @-replied to JOHN MAYER awhile ago. Just “hey, a person asked the Twitterverse a question, and I have an answer!” And then about 7 seconds later I wanted to hide under my bed.
BUT HE @-REPLIED ME BACK. I almost kissed my Blackberry. Hate that I love him.
Also wrote a fan letter to Ann M. Martin
Um I tweeted to Rick Bayless, a local chef celeb and he DM’ed me back. Sure it was just to say hi but seriously, I felt like I was the SH*T.
I don’t @-reply to celebrities on Twitter, but I got all excited when a local news reporter requested to follow me and even asked me a question! I felt all special, until I told my boyfriend. He laughed, because this news reporter isn’t actually famous. Whatever.
Okay, I’m totally guilty of doing this back when I first got on Twitter, and I am still totally embarrassed about it. It was John Mayer.
I knowwww, the shame!
OH, also, when I was about 8 years old I had NO idea how the postal mail worked, but it didn’t stop me from writing a letter to Mary Kate & Ashley. I wrote their names on the front of the envelope in my messy scribbled writing and put it out in the mailbox. My mom informed me that it wasn’t how the mail worked.
I still feel dumb.
Good lord, I just couldn’t agree more. A few times I’ve tweeted Michael Ian Black what I thought were pretty entertaining, insightful comments, spurred on by the fact that he frequently responds to his followers’ tweets, but then I got nervous and deleted them for fear that one of my friends would know I’m a celeb-tweeter. Too, too mortifying!
Haha this bothers me too. EVERY once in a while I will tweet at a celebrity (I almost died the day The Bloggess started following me back) but rarely. And even then, I know they’re likely not going to see it, let alone respond. But the people that do it all. the. time.? it’s just kind of sad, really.
Also, I 100% agree with not ruining the joke of the likes of Fake AP Stylebook and more. They said it, and they’re funny. What you say, you’re not funny. Leave it alone. The end.
Also! OMG! I forgot! I got retweeted by Chip Kidd once (famous graphic designer, which makes me really nerdy) and then he DM’d to apologize because he thought maybe I was offended and I was all HELL NO I JUST GOT RETWEETED BY CHIP FREAKING KIDD and so he offered to send me some stickers or something as an apology and I was like, dude. DUDE.
And it was the single most greatest thing ever and I apparently forgot all about it. BUT.
Sometimes they do pay attention. I’m just sayin’.
(I still stand by my original comment. I just had to add this one too. I squee’d for like an hour.)